KNOCKOUT Magazine | Movie Trailer Review AVATAR

AVATAR

Rating: PG-13

In Theaters: Dec. 18

Rating: 4 Humans

The white man goes to the new world, intent on moving the indigenous people away. Instead, he falls in love and realizes that they are the good guys and he's a bad guy.

It's like Pocahontas. Except she shows him the colors of the wind with a spear and pterodactyl. And there's battle mechs, cloning, space ships and aliens.

Do you remember when James Cameron introduced the world to bloodthirsty aliens that hatched inside your stomach and killed everything in sight? Remember when he then introduced you to two star-crossed lovers who took a fateful trip on the Titanic? Well, this flick looks like it might make you forget about the boat movie.

They're going to oversexualize Smurfette. I just know it. And I'll be torn. Is it OK to dig a blue chick who kicks a lot of ass? Will that make me too much like Captain Kirk? Wait a minute-she's not even real! She's a cartoon!

In fact, half way through the movie, it turns into George Lucas' back yard.

I bet the few actors they actually got in this movie are happy to have a role. Eventually, they won't even bother casting real people anymore. It'll all be done by animated characters.

The moral of the story is pretty simple, and you can tell where it's going. But I think it's all in the packaging. If the humans in this movie were landing on Jar Jar Binks' homeworld, we'd revel in the slaughter, shouting “I want my scalps!” Hmm. Maybe that 'Inglourious Basterds' line does work.